{Giveaway + Review} First Pages – FALLS THE SHADOW (teen SciFi) by Stefanie Gaither
First Pages is a series featuring an early draft of a published book’s first page and a short commentary from the author describing how that draft evolved into its published form. Being the first-page whore that I am (you can find me at Barnes and Noble flitting from book to book, reading a bit of each first page with either a nose wrinkle or approving nod), I’ve read a couple thousand first pages, and I started this series to study how authors get it right. It takes a lot of courage for authors to share their first or early draft, so these are a real treat!
In this installment of the series, we look at FALLS THE SHADOW, a Young Adult Soft SciFi involving siblings by Stefanie Gaither (Nov 2015, Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers). Reviewers have lauded the intriguing concept and compelling characters in this novel: “A solid debut whose gut-punch ending leaves room for a sequel.” (Publishers Weekly)
Early Draft of First Page
Chapter One: The Replacement
I took some of the flowers from my sister’s funeral, because I thought her replacement might like them as a welcome-to-the-family present.
They were in my lap, some of the velvety petals with little tears and creases in them, because I couldn’t seem to get my fingers to hold still; Mother had already fussed at me for dragging my nails through the leather seats (you’ll leave scratches!) and for drawing pictures on the foggy windows (those were just cleaned!). And when I absently sent yet another piece of petal fluttering to the floorboard, her hand snapped out, wrapped like a whip around my wrist.
“Honestly Katelyn, I wish you would stop fidgeting. There will be nothing left of those flowers by the time we reach Huxley.”
I sank farther down into the seat. The seatbelt cut into my neck and shoulders, but I ignored the burning and focused instead on the wobbly, watery world outside my window. Any second, the towering gray buildings of the Huxley Laboratory Compound would be coming into view. Father was already there. He probably already had the paperwork filled out, and New-Violet was probably already waiting by his side.
Not New-Violet, mother’s voice scolded my thoughts. Our Violet. The same, the one and only Violet.
She was right, of course. The girl we were picking up couldn’t have been any more identical to the big sister I’d always known. She was her perfect genetic copy. And thanks to our full cooperation with the labs, she had all our family’s memories, too. She would fit right in. It would be like Violet never left.
I was still nervous.
Some thoughts from author Stefanie Gaither
The first line was the same from the first draft to the final—it usually is for me. One reason for that is because I generally don’t start a book unless I have two things in order in my head: a strong blurb and a strong first line. I come from a marketing background, and I know how important these first-impression words are, so I really, really stress over them! Another reason is that I’ve also never really been the quick drafting type. I take my time and edit as I go, even though I know a lot of people say not to do that. I’m too much of a perfectionist to not at least try to make my first attempt as close to a ‘finished’ product as I can make it. And in the case of my first page, I got pretty close.
The rest of the book… not so much 😉 That’s why there are a few changes—Violet’s memory for one, things like the mention of “Huxley’s advancements in mind-linking and uploading technologies” which gave New-Violet all of Violet’s memories; that wasn’t mentioned in the first draft, because it didn’t exist in the first draft! It ended up playing a huge role after revisions done at later points in the book, though, so I wanted to be sure to come back and mention it as early as possible. Other small things: Chapter One became a Prologue, because in the original draft, there wasn’t a four-year span between Violet’s arrival and the main events of the book. Oh! And Katelyn became Catelyn. I honestly don’t remember why. Just because? I wish I had fascinating author insight into that, but I think I just liked the way the ‘C’ looked on the page better…and sometimes that’s all revisions come down to, honestly 🙂
Final Version of First Page
Prologue: The Replacement
I took some of the flowers from my sister’s funeral, because I thought her replacement might like them as a welcome-to-the-family present.
An hour’s drive later, most of the velvety petals had little tears and creases in them, because I couldn’t seem to get my fingers to hold still. Mother had already fussed at me for dragging my nails through the leather seats (you’ll leave scratches!), and for drawing pictures on the foggy windows (those were just cleaned!), and when I absently sent yet another piece of petal fluttering to the floorboard, her hand snapped out and wrapped like a whip around my wrist.
“Honestly Catelyn, I wish you would stop fidgeting. There will be nothing left of those flowers by the time we reach Huxley.”
I sank farther down into the seat. The seatbelt cut into my neck, but I ignored the burning and focused instead on the wobbly, watery world outside my window. Any second, the towering gray buildings of the Huxley Laboratory Compound would be coming into view. Father was already there. He probably already had the paperwork filled out. New-Violet was probably already waiting by his side.
Not New-Violet, my mother’s voice scolded my thoughts. Our Violet. The same, the one and only Violet.
She was right, of course. The girl we were picking up couldn’t have been any more identical to the big sister I’d always known. She was her perfect genetic copy. And thanks to Huxley’s advancements in mind-linking and uploading technologies, this Violet had all of the old one’s memories, too. She would fit right in. It would be like my sister never left.
I was still nervous.
Cate’s sister may be a clone, but that doesn’t make her a killer. Does it? Murder, morality, and a slow-burning romance fill the pages of this futuristic thriller “for die-hard fans of Divergent and The Hunger Games” (Kirkus Reviews).
When Cate Benson was a kid, her sister, Violet, died. Two hours after the funeral, Cate’s family picked up Violet’s replacement like nothing had happened. Because Cate’s parents are among those who decided to give their children a sort of immortality by cloning them at birth—which means this new Violet has the same face. The same perfect smile. She even has all of the same memories as the girl she replaced.
She also might have murdered the most popular girl in school.
At least, that’s what the paparazzi and the anti-cloning protestors want everyone to think: that clones are violent, unpredictable monsters. Cate is used to hearing all that. She’s used to defending her sister, too. But Violet has vanished, and when Cate sets out to find her, she ends up in the line of fire instead. Because Cate is getting dangerously close to secrets that will rock the foundation of everything she thought was true.
Amazon | B&N | BAM | Indie Bound | Malaprops Bookstore | Goodreads
The sequel to Falls the Shadow, told from the point of view of Catelyn’s sister, Violet, is now available in print, eBook, and audio formats!
Amazon | B&N | BAM | Indie Bound | Malaprops Bookstore | Goodreads
About Stefanie: After co-managing a coffee shop for several years while simultaneously earning her B.A. in English, Stefanie left the small-business world behind to focus on her author career instead. Now, in addition to writing YA novels, she also works part time as a copywriter for an advertising agency. She lives near Charlotte, NC with her artist husband, a ridiculously spoiled shih-tzu named Shakespeare, and a baby-to-be (currently affectionately known as Bumpeh) who will be making her debut in early December. You can find out more about Stefanie and her books at www.stefaniegaither.com.
Confessions of a First-Page Whore (from the cave-brain of your hostess, CM McCoy)
I grab a book from the shelf and devour its first page. Some sentences wind up on my Post-It Note Wall of Great Line Fame and some get rewritten inside my head as I read. I love them all. I am a first-page whore, and these are my confessions: FALLS THE SHADOW edition.
Best first sentence of a book I’ve ever read. Period.
I’ve read thousands of first lines, and this one set the high-water mark. I love the opening of this book so much, I use it as the golden example of first lines at my workshops:
I took some of the flowers from my sister’s funeral, because I thought her replacement might like them as a welcome-to-the-family present.
That one sentence tells me everything I need to know about this book:
- Readership: it’s probably YA. She’s welcoming a sister replacement to the family, which means she probably still lives with her parents, so it’s either MG or YA. Given the funeral, I’m guessing YA.
- Genre: we’re replacing a dead person with another person. This is SciFi.
- Mood: this book will be creepy. We already have a dead sister, a funeral, and some flowers the main character took from that funeral, which she’s about to give someone as a “welcoming gift.” That’s messed up. And now I know I’m going to LOVE whatever else leaked out of this weirdo author’s brain.
- Character building: the main character has lost her sister. She’s got to be grieving, but even so, she’s thoughtful enough to pick up some flowers for her new sister to welcome her to the family. That’s sweet–in a Wednesday Addams sort of way.
- World-building: for me, the first page of this book built this SciFi world perfectly. I feel like I get it: we live in a place, where, when someone dies: no big! You go down the Huxley and pick up a replacement, an exact copy complete with memories. What could possibly go wrong? <– cue the ominous piano chords.
Now that I know about author Stefanie Gaither’s marketing background, this makes perfect sense. She understands the gnat-fart attention span of readers like me, and she knocked this opening out of the park.
Stefanie packs a ton of info into her sentences without hitting me over the head with it, which makes this story move fast and sets a fire in my belly. That’s suspense, baby!
The only gripe my brain had was this: when Cate sinks into her seat, the seatbelt cuts into her neck. When I sink into my seat, the seatbelt brushes over my chin and hits my giant nose. It only cuts into my neck if it’s ratcheted and I lean forward against it.
I do love Mom. She’s the perfect unaffected control freak, refusing to let herself grieve. But really, why should she? Her daughter isn’t really dead after all–she’s just…taking a day off from life until the clone’s ready. That’s all. Maybe she’ll be stuck in permanent denial. Maybe she’ll never think about her Violet’s soul and the afterlife. Maybe God doesn’t even exist in her mind. Whatever her malfunction, I’m in love with all the places my gray matter has gone, and I’m sold on this book.
Cover and Title
The cover and title gave me no indication of the creepy awesomeness within. I honestly thought this was literary fiction when I picked it up.
From a distance, the cover looks like mountains. Up close, it reminds me of those silhouette pendant necklaces–you know the ones. I didn’t even notice the screaming shadow until after I read book. Maybe it reveals something disquieting about my personality, but my eyes just didn’t see it. Shame, because that’s pretty cool. I do love the colors, though, which is what ultimately drew my eye.
The title is a bit oblique, way too cerebral for me-the-browser, but super cool now that I know a little more. It told me nothing about the genre or plot, and I opened this book expecting a main character with a schizophrenic other personality called Falls. However, the first page shed some light. (<– see what I did there?)
Between the conception
And the creation
Between the emotion
And the response
Falls the Shadow
- T.S. Eliot, “The Hollow Men”
We’re celebrating clones! I had so much fun these past few days imagining what it would be like to be Cate’s sister, New-Violet, the clone. And I can’t wait to read Gaither’s sequel, INTO THE ABYSS, which is available now, and sadly, has ZERO reviews on Amazon! Granted, the eBook is $10.99 (COME ON PUBLISHERS!! THAT’S WAAAAAY TOO MUCH!) But, the hardcover is on sale for $12.55 on Amazon at the moment, and the audio book is free with a 30-trial of Audible, so there you go 🙂 I sure hope I can get to this in time to be the first review. But if any of you beat me to it, I’ll send you t-shirt.
This is the “What’s in Violet’s Goodie Bag?” Giveaway. Violet is a clone, so she’s probably a little confused as to where she fits in. So here’s what’s in her bag and therefore in this prize pack:
- An “I am other” notebook, stickers and keychain
- A paperback copy of Richard Dawkins’ RIVER OUT OF EDEN, A Darwinian View of Life (awesome book–loved it!)
- A gorgeous and trendy sparkly stone cross on a glimmering ribbon necklace
- A brain-teaser puzzle
- Artificial hears post-it notes
- A cheerful reusable shopping bag to carry it all
- A banshee tooth file (nail file), because nobody likes a banshee either.
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No, I couldn’t do it, it wouldn’t be them…
Not sure it sounds like my cup of tea if I’m honest. X
I wouldn’t want to clone a loved one because they’re not the same person. They can’t replace the real person.
I’ve lost my husband to a massive heart attack in 2009. He died in my arms. I’ve since had dreams about what it would be like if he were alive and it isn’t the same. Cloning is only skin deep. It doesn’t have the soul of the man that knew me in more ways than anyone else.
Oh Beth! I’m so sorry for your loss! Your post made me cry, and my heart broke thinking about you. I lost my bestie in second grad (horrible accident outside a grocery store where she got crushed by a bail of cardboard) and I used to have dreams that she came back. It felt very strange, but part of me always woke up hoping it could happen. One of the stages of grief I think…
Much love to you Beth!
I would hate to get a replacement. No matter how similar they would not be the deceased.
I would never clone any of my loved ones as they are not original and it would pain me to see everyday the face of my loved one and knowing it’s not who they seem to look like.
I do not know how I’d react because I don’t know who I would want cloned. I’ve lost several people I was close to over the years and I’m not sure how I’d adjust to them being back in my life.
I have thought about it in regards to my cats, who I all love very much, but so far, I feel like it wouldn’t be the same individual even if it was a clone.
Great review! Now I have to read it!!!
It’s be kinda weird to clone someone. I mean they wouldn’t be the same person cause they’d be without the memories and soul that makes someone who they are. So I don’t think I’d be okay with cloning someone.
Good point Misty! I loved the concept of FALLS THE SHADOW so much because of the “memory transfer” technology, which gives the clone all of the memories of the original. Thinking about this makes my head spin, but I just love all the thoughts I have!
Love the concept of this book
I could not clone a loved one or anyone from that matter, because you can’t clone a soul and a soul is what makes you.
While I would love to have my grandmother back, it would be creepy to clone her.
I think it would be creepy. Something would give away it’s clone self!
There are people and doggies I cannot live without.i am in ,
I’d be really uncomfortable and feel weird I think but maybe not I could always try to think of them as like an identical twin
I’d feel weird about it. I feel like it would be too different. Love the cover!
In the second version, I preferred the first version in describing the seatbelt affecting the neck and shoulders. Somehow I found that more dramatic than just the neck in the second version. I liked the add in the second version about her father’s company’s technology and that the clone sister would be at his side. Very creepy. To answer the question, I think a pet would be an option, but I agree the others sound a bit creepy! 🙂
I don’t think that would be very good for your mental health, it could be a perfect clone, however it still wouldn’t be the same person you lost (memories , life experience) those are the things that make us who we are.
Oh and I messed up on my Twitter handle its @jdanielle26
No worries! 🙂
If the clone had the memories and personality, I would love it!
Read the teaser, now I HAVE TO HAVE IT!!!!
I think it would be too creepy to bring home a clone of a loved one. I would like to read about tho.
Wow that’s kinda creepy! I don’t think I could deal with it. Thanks for the chance
I e thought about it often. I’d like to do it but would e concerned that I wouldn’t have the same relationship
I don’t think I would want to do that, because it would be a bit creepy……..
Btw thank you for the giveaway.
I would feel weird because even if they looked the same, their feelings might be different. Besides in my mind he’s not him.
There are so many days I feel like an impostor, altho I would not feel the “new” one was a replacement, I’d give it a chance.
I’m not sure, i think it would be a bit creepy for me
It is a little freaky. Just because they look like that person does not mean that they act or fell like them
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I think it’d be a little creepy because in the end you know it’s not really the person you love. Thanks for the chance
I can think of some people that I would love to see again but I don’t think I could do it. I don’t think I could handle the emotions involved in the loss and then the reappearance of a loved one. Thank you
Your two books I’ve looked into this one and eerie have my attention you are a new author to me but I so want more I’m intrigued and ready for you !!! Thanks for the giveaway opportunities you have going as well.
Thank you Amber!
It would be weird but I would love them.
As much as I would miss my loved one, I wouldn’t want a clone of them. It just wouldn’t be the same
Thank for running this giveaway!
You bet!
A clone would Just be too creepy for me.
I would love to have my grandma back.
Me too! that was the first person I thought of. Gramma — back and alive and healthy and well. It might be weird, and I’d wonder about her soul, but I think I’d go for it!
Sounds fascinating. I think I’m going to check the price and see if it’s in my budget!
CONGRATS CONNIE! You won a FLASH GIVEAWAY of a paperback of FALLS THE SHADOW! (If you’ve already bought it, I’ll substitute a $5 gift card) Email me with your addy and email addy <3 contact @ cmmccoy . com
No, I would know in my heart it wasn’t the same
Everyone is saying it would be creepy to have a clone of a lost loved one but I would love it!
I would do it too! Absolutely! Yeah, it might be creepy, but i’ll cross that creepy bridge when it presents itself <3
I don’t think bringing home a perfect clone of someone I lost could truly replace the one I knew. There might not be a physical difference, but I would know they weren’t the original.
This sounds so interesting. Great review CM!
I don’t know about this. I think that wouldn’t work for me.
I would like it I think…
This would be really creepy. I can see the good and the bad of this idea. I would like to have my loved one back but i think it would also creep me out.
I don’t think I could get a clone for a loved one it would feel too wrong
I don’t know if I would clone anyone, as much as it would be tempting.. I am going to have to get the regular amazon or paperback. I love paperback books 😉 thank you for the chance and Happy Holidays..
That would be so creepy. I don’t think a clone would ever replace the real person.
Wow This sounds Really Freaky and Cool Not that I’d want to but it still sounds cool
I think I would feel anger and just plain uncomfortable, I don’t think one would be able to grief either..
A clone would be okay I guess but I don’t think it would ever take the place of the real person even though it resembled them. Because I have no idea if it would react like the person it represented or if it had their same memories.
This is a yes and no answer for me. I’d love to have a least one more conversation with a lost loved one. But it’s a bit Stepford wife-ish – ala: be careful what you wish for.
Not sure I would be a fan of cloning. I would always know the clone isn’t the person that passed on.
Thank everyone who’s commenting! I’ve no idea why, but the comments aren’t sticking. Trying to fix this glitch now…
If I lost Gareth, I think I would be interested in a perfect clone. I wouldn’t be able to stand being without him in my life
I believe that letting go is a healthy thing to do.
Interesting question. While I would love to have some of my family back, I am not sure of the moral ramifications to do so.
I would love to have my Grandma back but I am not sure how I really feel about it.
I don’t know how I would feel to be honest. And I have sat here for 10 minutes actually thinking about it. I think I would feel I was being dishonest with myself and I don’t think I could do it. It would just creep me out to much.
I don’t know if I would or not. But I would like to say yes I would love to have my mom
I don’t know for sure if I would like a clone or not. But I would like to say yes I would
I am not sure. I have lost so many. How do you convince your head that the one walking in the door is the same one you know is gone?But how do you convince your heart that the one walking in the door isn’t the one you long to hold again. It would be a battle between one’s head and heart.
I don’t know I think it would be weird at first but if they did everything and acted like my loved ones I probably would embrace it and enjoy spending time with them.
Thanks for the chance
I think it would be a little creepy. On the one hand, it would be great to not have to lose someone you care about. On the other, no matter what, a clone could never be a replacement for that actual person. I’ve lost a lot of people myself and deep down I would always know that the clone is NOT my actual loved one.
This is an excellent question. One – I would love to have my Grandfather back. He’s been gone 16 years and I miss him dearly. However, I feel that a clone will never be able to replace the real thing.
I feel the same way– I’d love to have my Gramma waddling around, baking cookies this Christmas and slapping hands that invade the batter, but I keep thinking it’d be incredibly selfish of me to create another Gramma. Almost like I’d be a traitor. And then what happens in Heaven?? Will there be two? It would be hilarious and creepy at the same time.
I love it!! this is a really capturing first page!! now im dying to read it!!